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Sara Hendricks
2018-04-20T20:49:14Z
Cheating — as in the act of being unfaithful in a relationship — is more complicated than it seems. It's easy enough to say that cheating itself is bad, but when it comes to putting the people who cheat on their partners, or the people they cheat with, in distinct "good" or "bad" categories, things tend to get more difficult to parse.
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Because cheating, no matter what one's reasons may be, is so complicated, the stories behind affairs are almost always decidedly juicy. (There is a reason why they make for the most compelling fodder for supermarket tabloids and prestige drama TV shows.)
To that end, someone recently asked "cheaters of Reddit" to share stories about how their affairs started and ended.
INSIDER was unable to independently verify all these stories, but you'll enjoy scrolling through them.
1. She was (accidentally) the other woman
"I was the mistress in a marriage. The guy was an old boyfriend from high school, we dated off and on. When we were off he would date this girl Kelly, and when we broke up for the final time he went and married her. Almost a year after we broke up, I was back in town on summer break from college and ran into him at my summer job.
"He gave me this sob story about how Kelly wanted a divorce and was taking his kid from him. I (stupidly) believed him, we exchanged numbers, started talking daily. He invited me over to 'his' apartment, showed me his divorce paperwork, and ultimately things got sexual for a couple weeks.
"One day I swung by to pick up a pair of earrings I'd forgotten the day before. His best friend from high school answered the door. I asked if Guy was around, best friend said no why would he? Turned out Guy was actually house-sitting for best friend, it wasn't his apartment. Best friend also informed me that Guy and his wife were in the process of buying a house, their marriage was fine.
"I was livid and disgusted. I went to work the following day, and in walks Kelly. I ask her what she's doing later that night and if she's available to talk. We meet up after I get off and I lay it all out for her. She teared up a bit, but ultimately she was pissed. She gives me their address and tells me to show up there unannounced the next day.
"I do and Guy is white as a sheet trying to get me to leave. Kelly shows up and they end up in a screaming match. So Guy ended up getting divorced and settled with a chunk of child support because his wife informed the right people about Guy's pot plants. None of us talk anymore. When I think about it, I have to shower at least twice." — Reddit user PeanutPhotography
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2. He hooked up with an old coworker … then got a picture of a sonogram
"Was in a five-year relationship with my girlfriend at the time. I started to talk to an old coworker from my teens that I always had a thing for, but she lived a couple states away so I knew nothing would come of it. Well, it turns out that she still had family in my area and regularly visited.
"We made plans to get some dinner and catch up, for old times' sake. It ended in both of us getting drunk, renting a hotel room and having some fun. This happened a few times over the next several months until I get a text from her … it's a picture of a sonogram of our child.
"I was going to come clean to my girlfriend because I never had a father growing up and I didn't want to put my child through that. However, she ending up losing it a month or so into the pregnancy and we stopped talking.
"It left me feeling very guilty and anxiety stricken. 0/10 would not do again." — Reddit user RedBombX
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3. He met someone who made him believe in love at first sight
"I was young — 19. I had been with a girl for a year when my parents decided I needed to pay rent, so I found a roommate and got an apartment. Day one I go to the office to turn in my walk through paperwork. The girl in the office made my heart skip. She made me a believer in the idea of love at first sight.
"She moved in across from my apartment a couple weeks later and we started to hang out. One night we slept together. The next day I broke up with my girlfriend. Me and new girl talked and we both wanted to be together.
"She moved in with me a month later. That was 17 years ago. She's currently asleep upstairs next to our daughter." — Reddit user optimaloutcome
4. They fell for someone who was unavailable
"I once began a relationship with a guy from work who was separated from his wife. Then she found out and contacted me. Turns out he had done this before, many many times and they were not separated or considering divorce as they are Muslim. They weren't close emotionally or sleeping in the same bed but they were very much officially together. I felt f---ing awful, I'd fallen so hard for this guy. His wife was absolutely amazing, a truly wonderful person. I'm a piece of s--- for what I did to her. They're still together as far as I know." — Reddit user mixxvixen
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5. They both cheated out of spite — then decided to open up the relationship
"He cheated on me, things weren't going great. I decided to go cheat as well. It took no time before we opened the relationship and things have been better in terms of that since." —Now-deactivated Reddit user
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6. He started hooking up with his girlfriend's close friend
"I feel like I have no excuses to offer for the reason I cheated on my girlfriend. I was 18 at the time and had been with my girlfriend for three months, and during that time I became close to one of her other friends. Soon I found myself happier with her friend and I started wanting to spend more time with her than with my girlfriend.
"The reason why I cheated instead of breaking up with my girlfriend was because they were friends for a long time and I didn't want to be the reason as to why their friendship ended. In addition to this, I didn't want her to look like a 'slu*t' who just moves in on her friend's boyfriend. Overall it seemed like a tricky situation for both of us but we were young and didn't know how to navigate the situation properly." — Reddit user CaptainLeviA
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7. They had a work flirtation that turned into something more
"I was the other guy in a two-plus year-long affair. She was married and still is. No happy ending for me at least.
"Former work associates, we'd hung out a few times and just watched TV/movies, smoked, drank but nothing happened for a long time. I had an emotional and physical attraction to her, and the feeling was mutual. But we never crossed a line.
"One time at a party she got too drunk and since I was her ride, we both stayed there, in a spare bed together. Honestly, I wanted the intimacy of being close to somebody, and I wanted to make sure she didn't get sick in her sleep. I didn't do anything, and neither did she. Nothing happened that night.
"We hung out a week or so later, and she said she had liked my beard rubbing against her, and then asked me to do it again. This progressed over days to more intimately cuddling, grinding, groping and finally I kissed her. It was awesome.
"Making out progressed to oral then she really wanted to have sex one night. I declined at first (really) but we had sex. Then again, and again.
"She explained sometime after this that at the beginning she was feeling distant from her husband, he was pushing her to have kids and, according to her, being a d---. I wasn't that guy.
"It ended fairly recently because she was 'trying to distance herself from me,' and kept saying that, to the point I just said f--- it and gave up. It ended up in a minor argument and she asked if I wanted to break up, I said I wasn't certain, so she dumped me instead." — Reddit userother_guy123
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8. They had an affair with someone from the office
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9. They saw an old flame at a concert and knew it was meant to be
"A few years ago, I met this amazing guy. Let's call him Guy A. Fell very much in love with him, he was so kind and sweet. We kissed a few times and hooked up once, but he was starting to see this other girl, so it never went further than that. I was pretty heartbroken over it.
"Fast forward a few years. I'm a year and a half into this horrible relationship. We'll call him S---head. S---head is a compulsive liar, yells at me, threatens to break up every time I do something he doesn't like, like whenever I had a panic attack.
"I'm at a concert without S---head and I look across the dance floor, and I see Guy A, dancing his heart out, laughing and just being amazing. Hadn't seen him since the time we hooked up, which was a few years ago. My heart skipped a beat. I approached him, we talked for hours, and I told him I was living with a really s---ty guy and that I wanted out. When he kissed me goodbye, I just knew.
"I continued the relationship with my S---head for about a week (while still seeing the other guy on the side) before I finally worked up the courage to break up with him. I've been with Guy A ever since, and haven't looked back once." — Reddit usertsbae
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